imaginations?

Today.. i've been imagining too much.. i've been imagining about how is He over there.. i'v been imagining about school that is opening soon.. and mostly and suddenly.. i've been imagining my worst nightmare knowing my darkest secret ever.. and threatening me to do anything that he demand.. other than that.. i was also imagining the person who i was stupid enough to trust  one person that ALREADY knows my secret.. and threatening me as well.. or even worse telling my worse nightmare about it.. gosh i don't know if i was PMS-ing or what..but i was scared of that thought.. i hope that imagination or deja vu or karma or whatever comes true.. cause if it does.. god who knows what will happen to my freaking life.. everytime the thought crossed my mind i shivered.. scared of my own imagination.. hmph pathetic.. gosh i really.. really hope it dosen't come true.. i can't imagine myself trapped.. and my secret lies in his hands.. i don't want to think about it.. but i can;t keep it out of my mind.. and that jerk fantasia.. just keep bothering me.. i can't avoid him forever.. i just hope someone will just please save me or protect me or do something with that jerk..