hypocrite???

I feel like i'm a hypocrite.. changing attitude... changing friends.. i become sometimes self centered.. eventhough my friends say i'm caring and blah.. blah..blahh.. but i don't think so..  cause sometimes i say mean things.. sometimes i do stuff that hurt my friends... and sometimes i don't apologize when i did wrong.. yes its true nobody's perfect but.. i don't think i'm doing my best for my friends and family.. so maybe i need to search my self.. my real personality.. so that i can be really satisfied with my self.. so to all my friends out there... i want to apologize first because maybe i won't be being my self in the time being.. i need time.. so if i'm keeping my distance from you guys.. i hope you guys understand..

If this was a small world

People say that this is a small world.. but for me.. i don't think so.. people say that because they sometimes met the people they knew a long time ago.. i have been waiting for that moment for ages..  every day i hope to see my first love again even if it was just for a minute.. it has been 5 years since i've seen him. and i miss him like hell.. if only he misses me too.. but that won't happen even in a million years. why? cause he moved on. guess what he already has a gorgeous girlfriend.. and i'm left behind... i'm not just saying that. i have proof.. in his birthday 28 of march i gathered my guts to wish him happy birthday on facebook.. the next day i checked and.... he deleted my birthday wish.. well that't so obvious that he hated me with his guts.. since that i didn't post anything to him anymore.. and i lost contact with him... but still until now i'm really hoping that one day.. that maybe... just maybe he wanted to have a fresh start and be friends again.. but until now still NOTHING.. and i realised that out of all my crush and ex boyfriends i never loved any guy more than him.. i realised that i will never forget him... because he is my first love.. and a quote once said... trying to forget someone you love is like trying to remember someone you don't know... so that is what i feel/think now.. i'm trapped with this sick feeling.. haunted with our past memories..  and can't get them out.. only solution is...... brainwash....        

Choices

Life has been made for us like a path.. all you need to do is choose.. choose a path for your own future..  you can choose either the straight path or the curvy path...your choice.. everyone wants to make the right choices for their own good.. but how are you supposed to know that the decision you made is the right choice?? well its easy actually.. you just need to consider the bad and the good.. the consequences.. the benefits... everything needs to be considered in order to make the right choice.. but in making choices some people don't think about those possibilities... instead they choose to follow their heart.. their instinct.. they choose based on what they want.. but not based on what is good for them.. therefore choose what is best for you.. don't make decisions in a stressful state.. that will just cause more damage.. calm your mind and start thinking.. that's the best way to have a better life... and remember that the choices we make today will create something new tomorrow..